Big Brothers Big Sisters of Sudbury - Our Stories and Testimonials

The Story of Two Bikes, Two Half-Eaten Sandwiches and

Two Very Good Friends

“Do we have helmets?” I asked my little brother. Without skipping the slightest beat, Nick answered “Check!” Continuing with my questions, I asked “How about a lunch for our picnic?” “Check!” he replied. “And …have you looked on both sides of the street before crossing?” I asked in a final attempt to be a responsible mentor, to which he answered “Check!” in slightly annoyed tone.

Who could blame him? I was asking Nick the very same questions, practically every sunny Saturday afternoon in the summer of 2008. That’s when my little brother and I started our very own biking adventures. We had a nice routine going. I would pick him up at home in the late morning hours; borrow his mother’s rusty but functioning bike and together, he and I would plan our trailside mission. Geared with our safety kits, a well-packed lunch and some loose change for ice cream, we were ready to pedal.

With the wind at our backs, eyes on the road and our hearts set on biking as long as we both possibly could, Nicholas and I were quite the biking pair. He, leading the way to the neighborhood trails with his newly purchased icon-of-the-day backpack and I, always about ten feet behind, pedaling much faster than I would have liked to. Like any other of our biking expeditions, my little brother and I were trying to beat our previously set cycling record, which at that time, would have been an outing of about two hours at most. With the warm summer weather on our side, we were determined to break all records on that day. We set off to ride just as we normally did. Nick and I would start on his street, take a few turns to the right, followed by a couple of crossings to the left until we were content with our trail traveling adventure.

This day was different and for many reasons. First, we were set on beating our record. Second, we had packed a nice lunch and had no excuse to return to Nick’s house by noon. And lastly, we were feeling particularly adventurous. Always leading the way, Nick decided to explore a new trail, one that will forever remain in our memories. Nestled between suburban life and pristine wilderness, this trail was unlike any other we had ever set our tires on. Somewhere and sometime while pedaling around pedestrians, pine trees and the occasional blueberry patch, Nicholas and I were lost.

The afternoon sun was hotter than ever and our leg muscles were no longer cooperating. It was time for a break. We bit into our ham sandwiches, which tasted better than ever and chatted for a bit while sharing a few M&M’s®. With the bugs wanting a piece of our lunch and my desire to get back on the map, Nick and I slowly returned to our dirt-covered bikes, both of us ignoring the loud growls coming from our stomachs.

At this point, I think we were both equally worried that we may not find our way back home. Despite feeling disoriented, Nicholas and I made the best of the two hours or so that followed. Although we were pedaling in circles around the same old abandoned cabin, we were spending time together and that is what mattered. Most importantly, we were enjoying the simple pleasure of each other’s company while waiting patiently for an exit.

Moments later, Nicholas and I were stunned to hear the sounds of happy skateboarders in what seemed to be minutes away from where we were biking. Speeding through the dusty trail, we quickly passed by five teenaged boys who were obviously surprised that the trail was being used at all. I don’t recall ever being so happy to see a paved road before, or skateboarders for that matter. I suspect that Nicholas felt the same. Alas, we were on our way to Nick’s home, eager to share our story and our excitement with others.

In what seems to have been record-timing, we were standing in front of his door step. Within minutes of arriving, Nicholas and I were sharing our trailside story with his family, oblivious to the fact that our socks were spreading sand all over their newly installed hardwood floor.

Months have passed since our last trail traveling expedition, yet Nicholas and I continue to reminisce about our biking trips and all the other adventures we have come to share in the years past. I can only imagine the stories, experiences and memories that are waiting for us, either on that particular trail, on an upcoming camping tip, during a sleepover or at the mall. Now, when I tell Nicholas that every adventure is a story to remember, he is quick to agree with me, often responding by teasing “Check!”

Short story by Kristeen McKee with shared memories with Nicholas Warrenda.

kristeen and nick

The Chocolate Bar that turned into a wedding ring

It started at a bowl for kids sake while I was living in Fort St, John British Columbia. I was not matched at the time and was waiting for that stage to happen. I decided to attend the BFKS to support the fundraiser and was teamed up with a Big Sister/little sister match and a little girl on the waiting list. Her name was Lindsey and she had had a couple of matches already that didn't work out and we got to talking. We played our game and had a great time. She offered me her chocolate bar and I was hooked on her. We were matched not to soon after. A year of walks, movies and "sisters pizza" later, I had to move away (back to Ontario, my home province). I missed her like crazy but we kept in touch. She would write me letters about what was happening in her life and I would reply with the happenings of mine. We lost touch for a little while (her older teenage years) and then I found her again on Facebook where we still chat today.

Once back in Ontario I did not have the time to commit to a Little so I decided to join the board. I've held various positions on the board including President. I was on the board for almost 7 years before I was married at a Bowl for Kids Sake event. NO KIDDING! We were legally married on February 24th, 2007 at the Bowl for Kids Sake Event in Sudbury, ON. My husband and I decided that because we didn't need anything we would have our guests donate to the local agency as a wedding present to us. A little sister and brother were our flower girl and ring bearer and we all had a wonderful time while bowlers played in the background dressed in wedding attire. I soon became pregnant and had to step down from the board but whole heartedly intend to come back the agency when I am able.

That's my Story. It all started with a chocolate bar and a little girl name Lindsey.

Written by: Melanie Junge-Russell

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Message from Jennifer "Cross Gender Match"

"Some time ago, I decided I wanted to share my time with a special little person and wanted to be a Big Sister to a Little Brother. Yes, a cross gender match! As a woman, most of us has a natural maternal instinct, but my friendship with Travis has nothing to do with maternal instinct but a desire to help make a difference in one person's life. Little did I know the impact our relationship would have on each other.

Imagine my surprise when over time, I learned that as much as I was giving to Travis he was giving to me. I have come to adore my Little Brother and cherish the time we have together. We play, laugh and have so much fun together doing anything that our hearts desire. It is so much fun to share time with him and in return we have grown to become a true Big and Little. I delight in sharing stories and activities with him. This is a long term relationship that I take very serviously. I know that the agency considers my time "volunteer", I consider it a commitment of friendship! I encourage anyone thinking about becoming a Big to either a boy or girl to do so knowing that it's about giving of yourself so that you can help be a part of a very deserving child's life. It is by far the most rewarding experience of my life! I am grateful and thankful to Big Brothers for matching us!

jenn and travis Travis and Jenn

Signed,
Jennifer Keen, Female Mentor/Big Sister

Big Brother- Al

Being a big brother is an opportunity to make a difference in your community and most importantly in the life of a child. I know I am making a difference in my little brother's life as I've noticed marked increases in self-esteem and overall well-being. Laughter and smiles are more prevalent and attitudes have turned from negative to positive. Being a big brother is something I highly recommend to any adult. Why not share your magic that will last a lifetime. Big Brother - Al

Big Brother Kevin –

"I find a Big Brother is a very serious and equally rewarding responsibility. I sometimes wonder who gets more out of our relationship? Being a Big Brother sometimes involves being a sound board but most of all it involves being a mentor and a positive role model".

Little Brother Justin (age 15)

"Having a Big Brother is almost like a substitute father that I don't have. Every child needs a fathering or male influence in their life. Kevin has been an amazing influence in my life! I think we are probably the best match in Big Brother history!".

Big Brother William

"The cost is Little. The rewards are great. I sure am glad that I have become a Big Brother. Thank you for making this possible"

Little Brother- Shane . (age 16) Matched with a Caring Couple

What does it mean to you to have a Caring Couple? "It means to me that I have a friend who will help me with my troubles and keep me on the right track".

Mom: Louise Lascak -

"Tim's Big Brother Cliff has been a real blessing to us, I have been able to call him and share my worries and Tim and what is going on and in turn Cliff took extra time to be there for Tim and that really helped set my mind at ease to know that Tim can turn to a male figure and share with him things I am sure he would not with me...It's hard to be a single parent and I am very pleased to have had Cliff in our lives. It's amazing what a short few hours can do for someone who misses his parent and it 's wonderful to have a program out there to help us...I am very thankful for Big Brothers...Thanks so much".

Big Brother- Ed

"I really believe that someone out there needs to step in a boys life. Become a friend and a positive role model for a boy. These boys need a male in their lives, who will take the time to listen and do things with them. I would encourage anyone who is thinking of becoming a Big Brother to come our to a group outing and/or become a Friend for A Day to see how rewarding it can be for both the Little Brother and them".

Little Brother – Brian (age:15)

"Being an only child, it's given me a chance to know what it's like to have a Big Brother. It's helped me with my self esteem. It's nice to know I can count on him to be there when I need to talk to someone and learn more about male things, like cars and stuff like that. It's nice to have a good male role model in my life. I appreciate everything he does for me . I would like to thank "Big Brothers Association" for everything they've done for me. I would also like to thank Chantal for making this match possible for me".

Little Brother's mom: Suzanne

"Being a single mom is never an easy task. As a mom having a Big Brother for my son has helped me a lot. It's given my son a chance to spend quality time with a very good male role model. Being an only child, it's also given him ( in a matter of speaking) a sibling. I appreciate the time that his Big Brother spends with my son. I would like to thank "Big Brothers Association" for everything they've done for my son. I would also like to thank Chantal for this wonderful match".

Mom Cathie :

"Little Boys need to know what their role is in a family so they can grow up and be a positive member of their own family & society. This is hard to teach for me because I'm not a man nor did I ever have one while I was growing up . This is the best thing that I could have ever done for Greg.Having Geoff also shows Greg that there are men out there that actually want to spend time with him, instead of false promises".

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TESTIMONIALS FROM OTHER AGENCIES IN CANADA:

“I’ve learned how important I can be to a child and it’s kind of shocking! But it feels so good - the school tells me how Ashley’s practically bouncing with excitement waiting for me. Believe me, it’s wonderful for my self esteem too. I have total support from my workplace, which is great. I’m apt to give everything I’ve got to my job but this gives me time for something that means a lot to me, something that provides balance in my life.”
Lorena, In-School Mentor

“Ashley has a lot of energy and it takes a lot of energy to keep up with her and sometimes that’s hard when I’m juggling three jobs. Since her Big Sister Lorena came along she’s calmer and she’s allowed me to get closer to her. Our relationship’s gotten much stronger.”
Michelle, Parent

“If you haven’t been a Little Brother it’s really hard to explain adequately how one person can have such a huge impact on your life. I had my Big Brother for 3 years before he moved away - I like to think he’d be pleased that I’ve just been accepted to Med School. Now, as an adult, I have a really busy schedule, but I received such a benefit from my Big Brother that it’s important for me to be a volunteer. The In-School Mentoring Program is perfect for me. My Mentee is so much like I was - too much energy, short attention span. I really understand his frustration. We try to do things that are a bit different. Last week we made nanaimo bars which made him very popular with his teachers. We get closer every day - it’s an amazing experience.”
Chad, In-School Mentor & former Little Brother

“Being part of BigBunch is a great release from school responsibilities. I’ve really learned a lot about problem solving and leadership from our Group Mentors and I get a great feeling doing something for someone else. We do things my Little Brother Bruce doesn’t get much chance to do. He’s shy and this really helps him.”
Jacob, BigBunch Member, Grade XII student

“Steven took to Craig & Linda (Big Couple) right away...which is unusual for him. Steven has never had a man in his life. Craig and he share a lot of interests and since they’ve been matched Steven is trying new things with them. Steven’s self confidence has grown too. What might seem like a small benefit to most but is a huge benefit for me is seeing the happy faces my kids have after being out with their Bigs.”
Bev, Parent

“When I received you as a Big Sister I realized how lucky I was but I never told you. You helped me through the worst days of my life and shared the good days with me. You are my best friend and that will never leave my heart.”
Little Sister, Angela in what she describes
as a “long overdue thank you”, 11 years after
being matched with her Big Sister, Annette

“I am writing to thank you and everyone else for getting me a Big Brother, Mark. We have lots of fun together. We have gone fishing, I’ve seen some airplanes with him, we went to the park and the beach. Mark even came to my spring concert. I was Papa Bear.”
Little Brother, David

“Big Brothers Big Sisters gave me the learning experience of a lifetime. They invited me to a conference in Ottawa concerning youth at risk. This gave me the opportunity to learn something about myself that I didn’t really know. It brought up my self-confidence and self-esteem and desire to succeed. I was impressed by some of the programs other people were talking about. I think programs should enhance young people’s self-esteem, giving them responsibility and trusting them to make their own judgements. It’s like Big Brothers Big Sisters - it’s better to prevent problems than to fix them later.”
Angela, former Little Sister, delegate to Youth Partnership, Youth at Risk (1999)

“My father died when I was about 8 years old. I knew I missed something special. I’m retired now and have some time so I think it’s my responsibility to be a decent role model to a child. It costs nothing but a bit of time - and it’s lots of fun!”
Alston, In-School Mentor

“Dear Big Brothers Big Sisters,
I really love my Big Sister, she is just what I always wanted in a friend that I could call my own. She means the world to me. I want to “Thank You” for giving me such a wonderful Big Sister.”
Little Sister, Angela

“I feel really special because my Big Brother and Big Sister accept me into their home. Yes, that makes me feel really special.”
Luke, Little Brother matched to a Big Couple